That Is Not Your Voice

Many of us (I would wager all of us) have this voice in our head that speaks all of these really horrible things to us. It says really mean and hurtful things. And it's terrible.

But what I think is possibly more terrible and dangerous is that we've all started to believe that's actually our voice, and it just isn't. There are a million venues and reasons how those thoughts get into our head, but it is not because it is who we are. 

A few months ago I was dealing with some pretty intense anxiety. Someone finally spoke a few words that changed my life--literally. She said, "That anxiety is not yours." I had a lightbulb moment. I had been hanging onto this anxiety like it belonged to me. And if I believed that the anxiety was me, then how would ever really detach from it? You can't remove you from you, right?

So I did something simple and funny: I started talking to the anxiety. I started telling the anxiety that it wasn't me. And the amazing thing is it left pretty quickly. Now hear me out, this is not me trying to convince you to try an alternative treatment plan. This is me trying to convince you to view you in a completely different light. You are not mean. You are not anxiety. You are not depression. There are so, so many fantastic qualities that make you who you are, and those just aren't them. 

And I just don't believe our actions permanently define us. I believe there is grace. And I believe many of us make terrible decisions because we think we are fear, so it's something we just can't shake. But I believe if we started viewing ourselves as who we really are, our actions would look much different. 

Here's a side note: as soon as you give the real, real you a chance to come out and show itself, it's going to snowball. You're going to find you find yourself so much faster than you ever expected. Your you-ness is fighting to survive; it's grasping for air. And that's the person we all really want to know anyway. 

We've gotta start detaching ourselves from the lies because that is not your voice. That feeling does not belong to you. Those words are not your words. Quit claiming them. And there's a pretty big part of us that knows that's true, so believe that. 

Photo Story: For my Nanny's (grandmother) 75th birthday, we decided to plan a trip to honor her, and she picked a Disney Cruise. This reveals a little bit of the kind of heart she has. This trip is supposed to be about her, and she chose something that would bless her children and grandchildren. This photo is from our room on the cruise ship. The ocean represents wisdom to me. It also represents my grandmother and mother who also love the ocean (who also happen to be my wisdom). Those two chairs symbolize each of them peering out to the ocean, getting their wisdom, and filling me up with it. 

x Keely